Dudesday Tuesday: "I'm just worried I'm going to lose you"

Today we're going to talk a little about jealous boyfriends. It's come to my attention that I don't think I can name a young woman who doesn't have one. Whether they're in their teens or closing in on 30. It seems like men have no confidence in their relationship so they tell their girlfriend that she's not allowed to talk to other men, in some cases not even look at them. Some of the guys get angry and violent about it while some get moody and distant. It seems like every time a girl sits her man down and asks why he does this, they all give a slight variation on the same answer, 'I'm just worried I'm going to lose you'. Is this an honest answer? I strongly believe it is, in fact I would bet anything it is. But that brings up the real question; why is he so worried about that?

Men and women alike, when we do something wrong, we know it's wrong, therefor have a guilty conscience. Yes it does work both ways because women cheat too, some studies claim they cheat more than men, but for some reason these couples choose to stay together. Men, whether in a relationship or not, will generally go as far as their female pursuer will. Whether it stops at flirting, touching, kissing, fooling around or even going all the way even though they know it will hurt their girl if she finds out. If that girl is a keeper, he's going to do everything he can to keep her, well, except for the right thing. He'll lie about what he did and do everything in his power to cover his tracks, usually quite sloppily, but instead of changing his ways, he'll assume that his girl is doing the same thing. The birth of a jealous boyfriend. If he's doing something wrong, whether it be a little innocent flirting or having sex on a regular basis, he's going to assume you are too.

There's another big reason for him being afraid he's going to lose you, at the risk of sounding a bit harsh, he's a waste of space and he knows it. I'm sorry but a lot of guys are, hell, women too, the difference is that women are more open and will more likely discuss their insecurities whereas a man is quick to laugh it off and claim he could bag any chick in the world because he's so awesome. In his head, he doesn't have any clue how he managed to get you. A few signs he feels this way; he's mean to everyone, mean to you, doesn't want to talk about anything but the superficial, makes fun of everything and everybody, gets wrapped up in a 'manly' fantasy world whether it be graphic novels or video games, always seems angry or displeased, is quick to react in a hostile way, and of course, telling you he's worried about losing you.

So is he actually worried about it? You bet he is. Does he have reason to be? You tell me. Because if he's an unfaithful, bitter, waste of space that no one seems to like except you, maybe you've set your sights too low. Maybe if he gets worried enough about losing you, he might just change his ways. If not, please please please be careful, I've known these guys my entire life and nine times out of ten it does not end well. Don't settle for less than what you know you deserve.